Friday, April 23, 2004  

Next Thursday - April 29

Hey, all...

The Boston Comedy Festival is upon us again, and I've given up my art-faggy protests and have entered myself in the Boston Comedy Contest. My preliminary round is next Thursday, April 29, at the Vault (124 Boylston - downstairs in Remington's Restaurant) at 8:00.

I would love it if people came down and supported me. I'm still iffy on the concept of comedy contests, but if I'm gonna do it, I wanna win! Okay, not necessarily win...I just don't wanna get punked out in the first round by an open miker.

On Comedy and Reality TV

Wonderkind comic Erin Judge posted something on the Kvetch Board that really just summed up my own thoughts about what American Idol and its clones have meant for those of us trying to "make it" as performing artists:

Between "Comedian," "Last Comic Standing," and this article, we really see how my generation of comedians are becoming exposed in the climate of "reality" culture. It's like we're more interesting in our personal stories and extremely humble beginnings, like our novice stage is more lucrative to producers than waiting for us to ripen and become actual comedians. Have I just become more sensitive to this phenomenon since I've started doing comedy? Or does it seem like young comics are suddenly plastered all over the place, frightened and unfunny, shivering like featherless chicks in the wind? Is that really what people want to see? Not comedy, but some human story about wanting comedy? Is it more entertaining to watch "American Idol" or "Making the Band" than to discover a fully-formed entertainer? Is it more fun to see video of somebody bombing her third time on stage than to watch a brilliant, practiced 8-year vet do an air-tight 15 minutes?

It's a weird cultural moment, I guess.

Like she says, we're in this place where we idolize people for "taking their one shot" and completely ignore people with the talent and determination to make it in the long run. It should, of course, be obvious why I'm interested in focusing more on the latter.

Hit List

My wife is my muse. Sometimes she gives me the freedom and the inspiration to create; sometimes, she kicks me in the ass. This is one of those times. Apparently, I've been coming home and bitching about my comedy and my boredom therewith for over a year now. Apparently, she's sick of hearing about it. She's also sick of hearing about what I'd like to do with my comedy but haven't actually done.

So while laying a come-to-Jesus on me after Saturday's death match of a show, she pointed out that when I released the CD, I swore that my goal was to stop doing most of that material in very short order. And I've dropped about half of it. But the rest of it...still there, due about half to laziness and half to chickenshittitude. So I won't bore you with what I want to be doing, comedy-wise, but I am hereby serving notice on the following bits, which will be dropped from the act in this order:

Miguel de Los Santos
Giant Tumor
Olestra
Quitting smoking
Xenical
Maine Drinking Story
Too Fat to Hang
Snakebite

If you want to see them, come out soon, because they're history as fast as I can replace them.

Snuff

Oh, God. Last night's show in Holyoke, Mass. A private Jack & Jill bachelor/bachelorette party held in the dingy basement bar of a VFW Hall. I'd love to give a detailed blow by blow of just why I came home and announced to my wife that I'm quitting comedy, but I won't. The bride's parents, who had the idea to hire me, were truly kind and decent people who have been checking out this site, and I don't want to badmouth them in any way. They really wanted to give their daughter something nice, and I tried to help. I really did. Since I can't bitch in detail in good faith, let me instead just make this announcement:

I am no longer available for private parties.

No public shows this week. Friday is a benefit for Easter Seals, and Saturday is another naked show. I'll try to post something halfway funny in the next day or so. In the meantime, remember: YANKEES SUCK!